Once upon a time my sister

had left to qatar

i am very happy , as now i am free from that fighter..

i dont at all miss her

as she was a crusher of  my freedom

she thinks she is my master

why cant she be a builder of my confidence??

she shouldn’t act superior

as she was a annoyer..

i dont at all miss her….

   this particular piece of thing [ i do'nt realli mind whatever you call it] was written by li’ll ME  for an english rhyming word exercise  in school .. it sounds very naive and stupid now! my teacher laughed her lungs out then i  dont know why!

but apparently my sister was waiting in the qatar airport when i found this piece of **** …n i realized  i miss her like crazy!!!

*sister* is something the best that happened to me !!!

i love u sis!!

XYZ: hey

ME: im bored

XYZ:sounds very not interesting why u are not unbored,so what else

ME:nothing interesting!!!

XYZ:are u actually taking notes or u just faking it..man things are so very boring..need to find a new hobby!

ME:yeah

XYZ:tell me something i dunno about u !!?

ME: im a very cold person.

XYZ: i am very hot but thts something u already know!and i am very selfish,i do somethings for the sake of me..

ME: obviously im not totally selfless either!!

XYZ:no but i am more selfish than u think,i am very devious in my thoughts i play wid people like a game for my sick pleasure!

ME:isnt it terrific you know what you’re doing n still do it?what do u think about it,good or bad?

XYZ:good in the sense by me acting like this,i can get mad at someone and yell at them for no reason and get that off my chest and not hurt anyone..see if im obnoxious all the time i dont have to worry about people getting hurt!

XYZ:like i can completely curse off someone and actually mean but they dont get hurt cuz they think im just joking around!

ME:so its more like your making people accustomed to your behaviour.Your exploiting the vulnerability as much as u can becoz there is no resistance backwards??

XYZ:pretty much yeah but they dont know that!

ME:thats what i meant too

XYZ:kinda fucked up aint it??i act obnoxious cause i can get away with ..

ME: you are afraid of getting rid of it??

XYZ:do u want the brutal honest truth?

ME: yeah why not!??

XYZ k i think i’ve a group of friends because i get bored, other than that i have no need for friends..i have no relation to any of u..all of you grew up in a completely different environment from me..i will never understand how u people feel and the intensity of your emotions and u guys will never understand my feelings…i dont have anyone similar to me.

ME:that explains a lot!!

XYZ:for instance i hear things i dont give a shit about and pretend i care…honestly if someone is sad it doesnt concern me ,i ask if they’re ok just because the society is made up that way..if someone gets hurt i dont care unless its me..if someone is happy i dont care ,i simply piss people off because i can…….i only care about myself, i am the most important person i know,i dont care who does what or they did that, its all the stuff i listen to prevent myself from going insane in this place, its the show i play everyday,same script, just do what you have to do,i drink because im bored!!!!

ME: ok [ already dumb] but isnt it like you are trying hard to run away from something ?? may be the reality??/????

p.s : ionno what was going on in the convo except that im the one replying!!does it make any sense what xyz was talking?? or does it realli have to make some sense???

such things are a result of  insomnia!!!i act truly jobless sometimes though i am!!i realli dunno why i posted this randomly!!

IM gonna leave to my med school in 10 more min
DUH!! itz gonna be wierd n happy at the same time leaving home n getting back to college n eggjams n all crap!!
i’ll miss babbling in my own space for quite sometime then!!:(
back to the ground actually not pavilion…shud start batting ,bouncing n whtnot!!!
LOoking forward to my Psychiatry postings!!! lol!!

i used to use blogger a while ago but then stopped n again felt like going bak:

flirting with randomness
so this is it

do visit it !!!
cheers!!
keep blogging !!

I doubt how I fell asleep on the floor
In the hours of daylight!!!!
I guess the idiot box had some serious
Sedating effect on my sleeping abilities
Coz I’ve never been a morning sleeper
But this time it kinda jazzed me up after
Waking up owing to my insomniac qualities 
Felt like I missed a major part of the evening
Including the every day pani-puri  
My mommy darling was dead set against waking me up coz
She found peace n harmony in the house sans me!
Poor mother!but the dozzing off chipped in more
joie de vivre for the rest of the darkness!!
Come on letz rule the silences!!!

p.s: yea powernap!!!
p.p.s: I dozzed off watching some stupid si cinemah which starred very young saif ..lol

yay!!!
warning: asusual too long!! but its crazy enough!!

 

LAST TIMES…
1. Last beverage: lemonade

2. Last phone call: psycho-my frend

3. Last text message: from gees!

4. Last song you listened to:subah subah…

5. Last time you cried:been 2 days …

HAVE YOU EVER...

6. Dated someone twice: No

7. Been cheated on? yes

8. Kissed someone & regretted it? Yes

9. Lost someone special?!: yea
10. Been depressed? Yes

11. Been drunk and threw up?  no drinking …no throwing up

LIST YOUR FAVORITE THINGS:

12.my passion for the things I like

13. my profession
14. Coffee and more coffee

                                                                  FIRSTS :

15. Made new friends: Yes

16. Fallen out of love: Yes

17. Laughed until you cried:almost always!

18. Met someone who changed you: Yes

19. Found out who your true friends were: Yes , after loads of crap happened

20. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes

HAVE YOU:
21. Kissed anyone on your friend’s list: yes !!

22. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: 90 % of them on Orkut/FB
23. How many kids do you want to have: 1

24. Do you have any pets: No…

25. Do you want to change your name: never

26. What did you do for your last birthday: my results were out the same day !!so partied 27. What time did you wake up today: 8:00am (vacation time!! )

28. What were you doing at midnight last night: browsing about SEO

29. Name something you CANNOT wait for : the year 2013!!
30. Last time you saw your father: 7 hrs ago

31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: change is constant so I don’t bother about it much
32. Most visited web page: www.google.com [its become my lifeline]www.facebook.com [for the crazy quizzes]

WHATS YOUR:

33. Passion : writing,shouting,listening,blah-blahing n staring!

34. Nicknames: yoji,yo,yoj,jerry!

35. Zodiac sign: Virgo

36. Male or female or transgender : Female.

37. Elementary: MVM

38. School: MVM/Hyd

39. Colleges: Narayana , NRI med college

40. Hair color: Black / Brown

41. Long or short: medium

42. Height: 5. 38 ‘

43. Do you have a crush on someone- nopes 

44. Ever been in love?:  not exactly!!??

45. Piercings: ears

46. Tattoos? Nah!!

47. Righty or lefty: righty

48. First surgery: not till date

49. First piercing: while I was 5

50. First best friend: my dad..now ,then n always!

51. First sport you loved:running![cuz all I did was hit n run]:P…

52. First pet : no pets please!!!

53. First vacation: rajasthan

54. First concert:violin by some very old musician- just Fab!!…

55. First crush:this guy from school [?] ..

RIGHT NOW:

56. Eating: dark chocolate

57. Drinking: Water on the rocks

58. I’m about to:clean my inbox !!lol

59. Listening to: my AC ‘s grunt!!

60. Waiting for:my dad to come home and fall asleep,so that I can rule the silence!

YOUR FUTURE :

61. Want kids:?  Mm yea

62. Want to get married? Not any sooner though yes

63. Careers in mind? Predetermined already!!

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?

64. Lips or eyes: Eyes

65. Hugs or kisses: Both

66. Shorter or taller: taller

67. Older or Younger: Older

68. Romantic or spontaneous:hilarious J!!

69. Nice stomach or nice arms:  nice brains ?:D

70. Sensitive or loud: both
71. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship definitely

72. Trouble maker or hesitant:  both J

HAVE YOU EVER :

73. Kissed a stranger: Noo !!a stranger kissed me

74. Lost glasses/contacts:   sumtimes !!!

76. Broken someone’s heart: yea for own good[I knw im mean here] !

77. Had your own heart broken: nooo …

78. Been arrested: duh ?!

79. Turned someone down: Yes

80. Cried when someone died:yes ..

81. Liked a friend that is a girl? ofcourse

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

81. Yourself: I do ..very much…

82. Miracles:nopes

83. God: nah …

84. Love at first sight:  ahem! nope

85. Heaven: yea!coffee-rain,AC-sweat,mom-dad n me! J

86. Santa Claus: Hehehehee..

87. Kiss on the first date? Stop joking ???!!!

88. Angels: nah sounds kiddish.

89. Devils: there is a darker side ..yea I guess…

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

90. Is there one person you want to be with right now? Any random person ..lol!

91. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? No
92. Wanted to kill someone ever? Yeaaa,I already made a hit list )

93. Among you blog mates, whom would you like to kiss?nah no one !!! :p

94. Committed a blunder and regretted later?where do my instincts go after all!!

95. Wanted to steal you friend’s boyfriend / girlfriend?no interesting persons to steal!!…

Associate with something you wear:

96. White: dresses

97. Black: jeans,shoes,sweat pants,kohl,

98. Pink: shirts

99. Red: red??? No red … yea Tee’s

100. Posting this as 100 Truths?  Yea yea yea !!

 

p.s : tagged by adisha

Why do people smoke??

i dont even wanna know the so called smart explanations!! they argue that smoking is their right and they can do whatever they please with their bodies, some call it the ‘in thing’, someother do it cuz their friends say they should ,n some more say they wanna get a relief from all the tensions lifez been giving em !! duh??

.ugh! but whatever , why do these people[read it the smokers community]do it straight away on peoples faces[read it second hand smoking].

the direct smokers-has to face all the inevitable effects anyways as a part of their own chosen fate]

LOL! who else could know  how are they gonna die if not for chronic chain smokers!one should appreciate their fearlessness and dont give a damn attitude!   

    But the passive smokers,whom we call ’the second hand smokers’-are the victims in reality be it voluntarily like male or female counterparts,spouses,colleagues    or the involuntary victims like kids of smoking parents or random persons who are not concerned or at restaurants or public places!!                                 

 i know many doctors myself who are chronic smokers!!how shame n pity!err!! who save em??

nOte : * passive smoke i.e, the second hand smoke from the smoldering end of a cigarette and smoke exhaled by the smoker  has more carcinogens[cancer causing agents]           and  causes lung ailments,cancers,bronchitis,asthma n what not n what ever!                                                                                                

 ——->>> does that even mean something meaningful??? “statutory warning”!! why do they print it in the first place if people doesnt care??   And my biggest question —>> why do they manufacture tobacco in the first place??[ i dont know if this has a reasonable and explainable answer,if yes do let me know!!]     ,,

<<—>> ban in the public places should be followed stringently  to completely avoid passive smoking n save some innocent souls from the bad spirits!! n god bless those souls who cannot avoid it!!

—>> p.s.  : mostly effetcs kids n pets!!! so please keep away from ur kids and pets if u love em !!!

—->>p.p.s. : [ all these impromptu thougts cuz of the random person on a busy, heavy traffic road smoking right away on my face n giving me why do u stare kinda looks in return]!!

p.p.p.s.: R.I.P [ rest in peace all the legendary souls turned into ashes due to smoke] n  dont get driven away by songs like beedi jalaile

My Thoughts can’t fly high,
becoz they aren’t poetic.

They don’t know how to float,
becoz they are not light.

They can’t vanish like a dream,
becoz they are ‘nt an illusion

At last that bundle of energy can’t stay with[in] me ,

but they are potential enough to achieve!

now they are OUT OF WOODS.

They’re here . They are safe.

Ahh!!! That very single moment, I was not my own self

I didn’t believe that I was a living thing

No flashing thoughts

No fears

No sense of time

Thinking about nothing certainly…

Triumph-disaster

Good-bad

You-me

Dawn-dusk

Not a hint of these came to my attention

But …but just for one petite second!!!!!

The next second everything was  predictable….hmmmm

I doubt…is this what u call eternity??

[Went through this episode at some stage in my rain watching activity today]

My childhood lies like a distant memory

As i stand on the threshold of adulthood,

I’m no longer that little lad i used to be,

I’m almost a woman,

Learning what i should.

      Dont expect me to believe evrything you say,

As i have found an ability to reason,

And am difficult to sway,

Give me a few years and i’ll be gone,

Transformed into a woman,

Who will know right from wrong.

Please try and understand,

I’m not bereft of knowledge and sense,

It’s just that I am ,

Passing through a phase called “adolescence”